She couldn’t control her unruly hair or freckles, but she could control what she ate … I wanted to know the truth, and I demanded Jason tell me everything. As time went on, and we continued to stay committed to counseling and processing with each other, my heart began to soften.

Jason and Shelley Martinkus bravely shared their story in the Summer 2014 issue of Hello, Darling magazine. I made it very clear to Jason that I didn’t know whether or not I would stay married to him.

The issue of the magazine is called “The Privilege of Femininity.” We discussed a myriad of topics that shape and inform our understanding of what it means to be a woman, and we couldn’t skip by the topic of pornography in marriage. Even if I left him, I knew that I would still have to work through all of the emotional baggage left over from the brokenness in our relationship.

Include a comment below with thoughts or questions about how we can continue the conversation about pornography, sexual addiction and marriage. He put up a good front, but in private, he watched pornography, talked to women in chat rooms and even met a woman in person while engaged. One of Jason’s best days, when his secrets came into the light, was one of my worst days. I couldn’t live perpetually with such a bitter and resentful heart.

She smiled in public, but behind closed doors she cringed at her own body. As I did this, my heart became bitter, resentful and unforgiving. I knew that forgiveness was the golden ticket, but for most of the first year, I put forgiveness on a shelf.

Their dysfunctions kept the other at arm’s length — which fed their individual messes. She was caught in a never-ending mind game trying to figure out what was wrong with her. When Shelley asked me about it, I manipulated her to explain it away. In the end, I decided to come clean because she deserved to know the truth. I knew that it wasn’t an emotion that I would simply feel. So 13 months in, I wrote Jason a letter of forgiveness.

Shelley: I suspected something wasn’t right one night when he didn’t answer his phone, and came home very late. We were in the car on a seven hour drive when I told her everything. We sat down on the couch, and I read the letter to him.Being aware of the online tricks predators use will help you know what to look for.So here is a current list of some of the most dangerous apps: SEE ALSO: Pot and Booze Combo More Dangerous for Teen Drivers Than Alcohol Alone Many children are drawn to communicating with strangers, feeling that their secrets are safer with them than with their friends.Indy-Girl recognized that she was too old for him, which was “depressing,” but she offered that her little sister liked older men. “We could meet somewhere discreet.”John had been in the Army for eight years, serving in Desert Storm and Bosnia, and had graduated from Penn State with a degree in history. He also admitted that he wanted a relationship more than he wanted sex. He offered them sodas, and they chatted about what they liked to drink—Indy-Girl said she preferred beer—and about how long the drive had taken.He was thinking of leaving the service, in part because he felt picked on by other soldiers. He hoped to find someone who “could accept me the way I am.” “Give it a chance,” Indy-Girl encouraged. It was a “normal conversation,” one of the cops later wrote, until John “saw the agents approaching him, and he began backing away.” A plainclothes officer whom John had seen standing by the lake, holding a fishing pole and a tackle box, shouted at him to put his hands behind his back.On a Saturday night in the summer of 1998, an undercover officer logged in to a child-pornography chat room using the screen name Indy-Girl.